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Can you be who you are, and not have to leave an important part of yourself at home?

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A woman in college may want fun, popular girlfriends, but later crave closer friendships.

according to Lerner, who is the author of "In general, it's good to be on the lookout for friends who are trustworthy (they will keep your confidence), reliable (they show up and do what they say they'll do), caring, loyal, and who can give us wise and honest feedback without being judgmental," Lerner said in an email interview.

We spoke to life coach Pam Bauer and psychologist Harriet Lerner about strategies women can use to make their relationships with female friends more uplifting and how to judge when a friendship is no longer working.

What women look for in friends tends to change throughout their lives.

Those are people who are probably not going to be very good at lifting you up.”Lerner said friends should be able to handle the tough times along with the good."Don't look for the kind of 'positivity' that doesn't make room for the whole range of emotions that make us human," Lerner said.

"Sure, we should look for friends with whom we can laugh and have fun, but it's a serious limitation when that same friend can't be emotionally present with our pain and sadness."While you don’t have to end a friendship with someone who is negative, you should ask yourself whether it is truly worth salvaging, and if so have an honest conversation with the person, says Bauer.“It’s certainly worth it to talk to them and say ‘there is a different kind of relationship I would like to have with you,'" she said.Yes/No; Free basic profile members can still see photos, edit profiles, search, use discussion board.Paid members can freely message, start discussion thread, no daily limit of disucssion board entries. Members only see intersection of what they are looking for and what other members are looking for. Free messaging and status posting for undergraduates (5 messages/day limit). 38 year old guy living in Clapham, originally from Brighton.Stitch is the world’s only companionship community created by members, for members.Our members are often fulfilled with family, work, and finances, but are looking for something more in their lives: partners, friends, companionship.

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