Panjabi opan sax - Love at second sight playing the midlife dating game

Advice from pros Dating after 40 can feel as awkward as the first day of high school.The author, who married her cybersweetheart at age 52, explains the world of online dating, which she says offers the best odds for women over 35.

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When you're older, though, that forgiveness goes away fast.

If a slight flaw appears on the first date, most people abandon ship." Sometimes it's a few extra pounds; other times, it's all that emotional junk in the trunk.

"I hear a lot of moaning from both sides," says Grigsby, who interviewed 400 singles for his book.

"The women think the men are all damaged goods or egomaniacs or control freaks and the men point fingers at the women saying they're over-assertive, they're bitter, they don't take care of themselves." It's a miracle that any of us in our 40s and 50s manage to hook up at all.

Yet while we've sidestepped an early entrance into old age, we're less adept at dodging those age-old dating blues.

When it comes to dating in the F-Zone — 40, 50 and older — there's a whole new set of complications to deal with.

Collins New Horizon Press (January 2004) .95 (224pp) 978-0-88282-247-1 The magic of first-time love is celebrated to no end, but what about the second, or for that matter, third, fourth, or even fifth time around?

Surveys say that the majority of the more than forty million American singles age forty and older are eager—even desperate—to find “The One.” These singles know and often expect more than they did in their earlier days, so their search for love is often more complicated, realistic, and urgent than it once was. The good news, say these authors—one a technology expert and eligible bachelor, the other a writer and expert on women’s issues—is that the dating and mating game can be navigated and won by those who thoroughly study the situation “out there” and approach their quest for love with the right attitude. While there is an element of outdated and stereotypical dos and don’ts (telling women to hold off on sex, to smile prettily, and not to “mother” their dates; and reminding men to compliment, not to brag, and to dress well), the book is, overall, chock-full of tips on finding love for those serious about succeeding.

according to such cultural arbiters as The New York Times, People magazine and millions of devoted "Desperate Housewives" fans.

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