Dating advice playing hard to get

For example, she’ll tell you about a guy who hit on her and then mention how weird he was.“It’s her way of nudging you and letting you know there’s competition,” says Yue Xu, dating expert at “It causes them to perceive more interest from a woman than there might actually be.” Here are five ways she regularly plays hard to get, and how to determine if she’s interested—or if you’re seeing something that’s just a figment of your imagination.

There’s a method behind her madness: She’s playing hard to get to gauge your interest and level of commitment, a new study in the European Journal of Personality reveals. But is your new lust playing an evolutionary dating game or is she just not that into you?

Women who act demure at first are mainly looking to weed out guys who want one-night-stands rather than real relationships, says study author Peter K. Don’t feel bad if you’re not sure—you’re wired to think she’s interested, even if she’s not, says psychotherapist Vinita Mehta, Ph. “Men suffer from sexual over-perception bias,” Mehta explains.

She’s the opposite of an over-sharer: She’s busy, sometimes flaky, and always vague about the details.

When you ask her about her day, she hints at an exciting event at work but fails to follow through with the story.

“But she also wants you to know that you’re the first in line.” You took her out and had a great time—and now she’s acting distant and aloof. “She wants to be the opposite of clingy, so she overcompensates by being extra detach-y.” She’s still interested if: She leaves the door—to the future—open.

Or maybe you set up a date for tomorrow, but she just called to say she can’t make it because she has an emergency “work thing.” Sounds fishy, so what gives? Dating is a game of give-and-take, and if she’s playing hard to get, she knows that.

So she won’t flake on you completely without giving you something to hang onto.

If she cancels a date at the last minute, she might mention that her schedule is freer next week.

Or if she stops texting for a few days after you hang out, she’ll casually reconnect to let you know that she’s still around.

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